I FN Hate….Facebook. Again.
So it seems like every writer here has had a pop at the old Book of Face, and for good reason, since it has a lot of annoying shit there. Most of my grievances with Facebook come from having dribbling idiots on my friends list (if you’re reading this on Facebook, it’s not you I’m referring to. Unless it is, in which case you are a clown shoe) and the problems caused by this such as clogged up news feed, dull statuses, drama queens and all that jazz.
But the latest thing to get my goat about Facebook is them fucking pointless groups/pages where you have to become a fan before you can see the picture. Usually it’s stuff like “I LOLed at this cat” or “I ROFLed at this down’s syndrome kid”, but they don’t let you see a picture of the down’s syndrome kid with an ice cream cone stuck to his forehead, you have to become a fan to see the frigger. Fuck that. This is the internet, if I want to see a picture of a cat in a “hilarious” picture, I don’t have to look very hard. I ain’t joining your shitty page just to see the latest one. Also, I fucking hate those “I LOLed at….” groups in general. Did you LOL? Really? Or are you just adding this page to your enormous agglomeration of pointless shit you’ve become a fan of because you’re an annoying twat who spends all day “liking” pictures of car park signs with dirty connotations rather than doing anything useful with your life. If you’re that easily amused that a sign saying “use rear entrance” has you “ROFLing”, then in a way I am jealous of you for laughing so often if that is all it takes to get you chuckling. But in another, more accurate way, I think you are a knob.
It's funny cos anal.
So now expect to see more and more of these hilarious images being worshipped. Except now you have to jump through hoops to see them. Next time you’re thinking “should I become a fan of this page?”, before you reach a conclusion, try and picture me stabbing a kitten in the mouth with a Black & Decker electric drill. Because if that’s what it takes to stop you doyles from filling my news feed with shit, then that is what I shall do. Come here Tiddles…